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Do red bags get loaded onto a plane first? Travel hack goes viral

One TikTok user has racked up over 75 million views for their hack which warns travellers against buying red suitcases. The reason behind it? He claims that red suitcases are always loaded onto a plane first - meaning that they will be the last ones to come out at the baggage carousel. The <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@airportlife_/video/7359248989134327072" target="_blank" rel="noopener">viral video</a> showed a plane's cargo being loaded, with all the red bags being loaded first. Many commenters have shared their theories on why this might be the case. "If the red are at the back then they are less likely to get left behind when unloading," one wrote. "So that it's easier to check if there is any bag left at end corner of loading area and prevent missing out black bags at dark corners, maybe," another added. However, a spokesperson for KLM Royal Dutch Airlines has debunked this theory and claimed that the video is "nonsense" and "was made purposefully to mislead or provide false information". They also said that there was simply not enough time for their baggage handlers to sort suitcases out by colour. The question of "Do red bags get loaded onto a plane first?" also made its way to Reddit, after the video went viral, and one user who claimed to be a ramp worker denied the theory. "If we had taken the time and brain power to load bags based on colour I'd still be loading flights from 2015." Image: TikTok

Travel Tips

Airbnb launches real-life "Up" house - and it actually floats!

Airbnb is taking its latest listing to the sky - literally. The accommodation provider has announced a partnership that will see the iconic house from Pixar's hit film Up being lifted into the air, balloons and all. In their ongoing quest to redefine hospitality, Airbnb has launched a permanent category called “Icons,” which features partnerships with brands and celebrities that promise unforgettable experiences. Suspended over the New Mexico desert with the aid of a crane, the property looks like an exact replica of the home and contains adorable easter eggs from the film - including the Adventure Book. “Icons take you inside worlds that only existed in your imagination — until now,” Airbnb CEO and co-founder Brian Chesky said in a statement. “As life becomes increasingly digital, we’re focused on bringing more magic into the real world … we’ve created the most extraordinary experiences on Earth." The house offers a stunning view of the desert, which you can enjoy while sitting on replica's of Ellie and Carl's chairs or have breakfast with a view in the kitchen. Alternatively, you could look at the stars while sitting on the front porch - but don't look down because the adventure is out there. Of course there are questions about the logistics of the stay, including plumbing and electricity, but the accommodation giant has assured that the house is “fully functional,” connected to generators and utilities that will be seamlessly managed before and after its flight. Other fantastical listings include a replica of the mansion from the “X-Men ’97” cartoon, a stay at the Ferrari Museum in Italy, and Prince's house that was featured in the legendary film Purple Rain. Check out the <a href="https://www.airbnb.com.au/rooms/1126185893236246260?_set_bev_on_new_domain=1715826165_M2NkZDdkODdhMjcy&source_impression_id=p3_1715826166_A20M4770EGAtl8AV&modal=PHOTO_TOUR_SCROLLABLE" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Up</a> listing here, be warned the sweet listing may make you shed a tear or two. Images: Airbnb

Real Estate

Don’t give mum chocolates for Mother’s Day. Take on more housework, share the mental load and advocate for equality instead

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/leah-ruppanner-106371">Leah Ruppanner</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/the-university-of-melbourne-722">The University of Melbourne</a> With Mother’s Day right around the corner, many grateful and loving families are thinking about what to give mum to show their appreciation. Should you give her chocolate? Nope. Fancy soaps? Nope. Fuzzy slippers, pyjamas, scented candles? No, no and no. On this Mother’s Day, keep your cash and give your wonderful mother gifts that will actually have a long-term impact on her health and well-being. <h2>1. Do a chore that mum hates and hold onto it … forever</h2> Research <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/13545701.2020.1831039">shows</a> men have increased the amount of time spent on housework and childcare and that mothers, over time, are doing less (hooray!). But, women <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.1741-3737.2008.00479.x">still do more housework</a> than men, especially when <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/gwao.12497?fbclid=IwAR2dp04p2sFqbDqdehXmXgDSfTYwX3GRzP7ScMJhSOrMePTGQVErR2TTX88">kids are in the home</a>. Further, <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0891243205285212">men tend to pick up the more desirable tasks</a>, like <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/3598304">cooking and playing with the kids</a>, leaving mothers to do the less pleasurable chores (think cleaning toilets and clearing out fridges). The chore divide in same-sex relationships is generally found to be more equal, but some critique suggests equality may suffer <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2018/05/16/upshot/same-sex-couples-divide-chores-much-more-evenly-until-they-become-parents.html">once kids are involved</a>. This year give your mum (or mums) the gift of equal housework and childcare sharing – start by taking the most-hated tasks and then hold onto them… forever. <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/gwao.12727">Research</a> shows housework inequality is bad for women’s mental health. Undervaluing women’s housework and unequal sharing of the chores deteriorates <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s11199-022-01282-5">relationship quality</a>, and <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/0038038516674664">leads to divorce</a>. Housework and childcare take up valuable time to keep the family happy, harmonious and thriving, often at the expense of mum’s health and well-being. So, skip the chocolates and show mum love by doing the worst, most drudgerous and constant household chores (hello, cleaning mouldy showers!) and keep doing these… forever. <h2>2. Initiate a mental unload</h2> The <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/health/2017-09-14/the-mental-load-and-what-to-do-about-it/8942032">mental load</a> is all of the planning, organising and management work necessary to keep the family running. The mental load is often perceived as list making or allocating tasks to family members. But, it’s so much more – it is the <a href="https://theconversation.com/planning-stress-and-worry-put-the-mental-load-on-mothers-will-2022-be-the-year-they-share-the-burden-172599">emotional work</a> that goes with this thinking work. The mental load is the worry work that never ends and can be done <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/13668803.2021.2002813">anywhere, anytime and with anyone</a> (in, for example, said mouldy shower). Because the mental load is performed inside our heads, it is invisible. That means we don’t know when we or others are performing this labour unless we really tune in. In fact, it is often when we tune in through quiet time, relaxation or meditation that the mental load rears its ugly head. Suddenly you remind yourself to buy oranges for the weekend soccer game, organise a family movie night and don’t forget to check in on nanna. Women in heterosexual relationships are <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0003122419859007">shown to do more</a> of the mental load with serious consequences for their mental health. But we don’t have a comprehensive measurement of how much women do it nor how it is allocated in same-sex couples. So, on this mothers’ day spend some time talking about, cataloguing, and equalising the family’s mental load. This isn’t just making a list about what has to be done but also understanding <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/health/2017-09-14/the-mental-load-and-what-to-do-about-it/8942032">how the mental load</a> connects to the emotional health of the family, and the person carrying this <a href="https://www.newamerica.org/better-life-lab/blog/making-the-mental-load-visible/">invisible labour, worry and stress</a>. <h2>3. Speak up for your mum and all caregivers</h2> Families alone cannot bear the brunt of the caregiving necessary to keep us thriving. Governments, workplaces and local communities also play a critical role. For this mothers’ day, pick an issue impacting mothers (for example, equal pay, affordable childcare or paid family leave) and do one thing to help move the needle. Write a letter to your boss, your local MP, or donate money to an advocacy organisation advancing gender equality. Or, role model these behaviours yourself – normalise caregiving as a critical piece of being an effective worker, create policies and practices that support junior staff to care for themselves, their families and their communities and use these policies. <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0891243216649946">Research</a> shows men want to be equal carers and sharers but often fear what taking time off for caregiving will signal to their employer despite evidence that fathers who request flexible work are perceived more <a href="https://academic.oup.com/sf/article-abstract/94/4/1567/2461609?login=false">favourably</a>. Appearing to be singularly devoted to work was shown to be impossible during the pandemic with kids, spouses, partners, and pets home all day long. Learning to create more care-inclusive workplaces and communities is critical. Paid parental leave, affordable and accessible high-quality childcare, flexibility in how, when and where we work and greater investments in paid sick leave, long-term disability support and aged care are just a few policies that would strengthen the care safety net. We will all be called upon to care at some point in our lives – let’s create the environments that support caregiving for all, not just mum.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/182330/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/leah-ruppanner-106371">Leah Ruppanner</a>, Professor of Sociology and Founding Director of The Future of Work Lab, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/the-university-of-melbourne-722">The University of Melbourne</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/dont-give-mum-chocolates-for-mothers-day-take-on-more-housework-share-the-mental-load-and-advocate-for-equality-instead-182330">original article</a>.

Family & Pets

Is attachment theory actually important for romantic relationships?

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/marissa-nivison-1454992">Marissa Nivison</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-calgary-1318">University of Calgary</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/sheri-madigan-417151">Sheri Madigan</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-calgary-1318">University of Calgary</a> There has been a recent surge of attention toward attachment theory: from <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTL2aW9va/">TikTok videos</a> to <a href="https://quiz.attachmentproject.com/">online quizzes</a> that claim to “assess your attachment style.” It’s become a hot topic, especially in the context of romantic relationships, with <a href="https://medium.com/curious/the-theory-that-explains-all-your-failed-relationships-fb2dc2551617">some articles</a> claiming that one person (or partner’s) attachment styles are the reason why relationships fail. As experts in developmental and clinical psychology focusing on attachment theory, we seek to provide an accessible resource to better understand the science of attachment, and what it means for one’s romantic relationships. <h2>What is attachment?</h2> Attachment theory stems from the field of developmental psychology. It is the notion that in the first year of life, the ways in which a parent and caregiver respond to a child’s needs shape a child’s expectation of relationships across their lifespan. In research, attachment has been associated with well-being across the lifespan including: <a href="https://doi.org/10.1017/S0954579499002035">mental</a> and <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/14616734.2018.1541517">physical</a> health, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/a0032671">brain functioning</a> and even <a href="https://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/document?repid=rep1&type=pdf&doi=092354a82953ac321429f84b00607bcd44ac4c63">romantic relationships</a>. <figure class="align-center "><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=455&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=455&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=455&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=572&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=572&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=572&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" alt="Illustrations of four different attachment styes" /><figcaption>There are two overarching types of attachment: secure and insecure. Types of insecure attachment include disorganized, avoidant and anxious attachment. (Shutterstock)</figcaption></figure> <h2>How is attachment related to romantic relationships?</h2> Among professionals in the field, there is diversity in perspectives regarding how attachment relates with romantic relationships. As developmental psychologists, we tend to think that attachment is associated with romantic relationships through what we call the “<a href="https://doi.org/10.1080/14616739900134191">internal working model</a>.” In childhood, when a parent is consistent and responsive in tending to their child, the child learns that their parent can be counted on in times of need. These expectations and beliefs about relationships are then internalized as a blueprint, sometimes in popular media referred to as a “<a href="https://medium.com/live-your-life-on-purpose/love-maps-are-a-gamechanger-when-you-have-an-anxious-attachment-style-dc8f219ab0af">love map</a>.” Just like how an architect uses a blueprint to design a building, a child’s attachment to their parents provides a blueprint for understanding how to approach other relationships. Based on this blueprint, people develop expectations of how relationships should work, and how other important people in their life, including partners, should respond to their needs. Sometimes attachment is also described in terms of attachment “styles.” There are two overarching types of attachment: <a href="https://doi.org/10.4324/9780203758045">secure and insecure</a>. Those with a secure attachment style tend to have expectations that their attachment figures (and later, partners) will be responsive, sensitive and caring in times of distress. People with secure “blueprints” find it easier to build new structures (i.e., relationships) with the same design. People with insecure blueprints — such as disorganized, avoidant or anxious attachment styles — may face relationship challenges when their current relationship doesn’t align with their childhood experiences, and may need to renovate their blueprint design together with their partner. Whether you think about attachment as a style or a love map, they both are related to expectations of relationships, which are shaped by past experiences. In research we see that people who had consistent, reliable and sensitive parents are more likely to have more positive relationships — including <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1475-6811.1997.tb00135.x">friendships</a>, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/cdev.13322">teacher-child relationships</a> and yes, <a href="https://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/document?repid=rep1&type=pdf&doi=092354a82953ac321429f84b00607bcd44ac4c63">romantic relationships too</a>. <h2>Relationships with parents and relationships with partners</h2> Although we do see in research that better childhood relationships are associated with better romantic relationships, there is still a large part of the population who have good relationships with partners, despite their history of lower-quality relationships with their parents. <figure class="align-center "><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=453&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=453&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=453&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=569&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=569&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=569&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" alt="Illustration of loving parents with a child, and the grown child in a loving relationship" /><figcaption>In research we see that people who had consistent, reliable and sensitive parents are more likely to have more positive relationships. (Shutterstock)</figcaption></figure> It is possible for romantic relationships to serve as a <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/1089-2680.4.2.155">“healing relationship”</a> and improve one’s own internal working model of relationships. Specifically, when a partner is consistently sensitive, responsive and available, a person may begin to adjust their blueprint and develop new expectations from relationships. Attachment theory consistently supports the idea that one’s patterns of attachment <a href="https://eric.ed.gov/?id=EJ960225">can change</a>. So, all in all, the answer is no: Your relationship with your parents influences but does not determine the quality of your romantic relationships. <h2>Is attachment the reason why my relationships don’t work out?</h2> It is possible that your expectations of a romantic relationship may not align with the expectations of your partner, and may affect the quality of the relationship. For example, sometimes individuals with insecure attachments may withdraw when they are upset, but their partner who has a secure attachment may be upset that their partner is not coming to them for comfort. Thinking through your own attachment history and expectations of relationships may be a great opportunity for self-reflection, but it is important to remember that attachment is only one part of a relationship. Communication, trust and respect, to name a few, are also critically important aspects of a relationship. <h2>Can I improve my attachment expectations?</h2> The short answer: Yes! Improving attachment quality has been one of the cornerstones of attachment theory and research since its conception. Most commonly, attachment is targeted in <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC0LCPe5CMarYi1NmqNttDcg/videos">childhood through interventions</a>, but also in adulthood through individual therapy, or various forms of couples therapy, such as <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xaHms5z-yuM">Emotionally Focused Therapy</a> or the <a href="https://www.gottman.com/about/the-gottman-method/">Gottman Method</a>. It is also possible that through positive relationships you may be able to improve your own expectations of relationships. There are many different avenues to explore, but improvement is always possible. In sum, attachment can be an important factor in romantic relationships, but it is not a “catch-all” to be blamed for why relationships may not work out. Thinking about your own expectations for relationships and talking through those with your partner may do great things in improving the quality of your relationships! <img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/226101/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/marissa-nivison-1454992">Marissa Nivison</a>, Postdoctoral Research Fellow, Department of Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-calgary-1318">University of Calgary</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/sheri-madigan-417151">Sheri Madigan</a>, Professor, Canada Research Chair in Determinants of Child Development, Owerko Centre at the Alberta Children’s Hospital Research Institute, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-calgary-1318">University of Calgary</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/is-attachment-theory-actually-important-for-romantic-relationships-226101">original article</a>.

Relationships

Give the gift of sustainable luxury this Mother’s Day

With Mother’s Day around the corner, it’s time to celebrate the most important women in our lives with affordable luxury that doesn’t cost the earth. To spoil the mums in your life this year, discover the ideal gift to honour and celebrate your most treasured moments together with L’Occitane’s limited edition Mother’s Day collections. You can feel good about gifting these organic and sustainably sourced products to your loved ones, as L’Occitane have created these little luxuries while respecting and caring for everything the ground grows for us and beyond. By sourcing fair-trade and organic shea butter from women’s collectives in Burkina Faso and recently in Ghana, L’Occitane are dedicated to helping the local ecosystem and supporting the community. The L’Occitane group celebrates the official B Corp certification, demonstrating that as a business, they’re not just about beauty; they believe in Cultivating Change to create a fairer, more equitable and regenerative planet. This Mother’s Day, L’Occitane has something for everyone, with gift packs available for every budget, ranging from just $34 to the ultimate gift set priced at $280. From hand creams, body lotions and washes, to fragrances and luxury skin care, these limited edition gifting packs have exactly what you need to give the gift of indulgence this Mother’s Day. L’Occitane presents a superb range that embodies the essence of gratitude, showing appreciation through thoughtfully selected gifts that not only pamper, but also reflect a commitment to sustainable practices. It’s more than a gift; it’s a gesture that acknowledges the importance of those who have shaped our lives. L’Occitane’s Mother’s Day collection is available now both <a href="https://au.loccitane.com/mothers-day.html">online</a> and in-store. Image credits: Supplied / Getty Images

Beauty & Style

"First day of school": Charles Spencer shares unseen snap of Diana

Charles Spencer has shared a previously unseen photo from his school days with his late sister Princess Diana. The sweet photo shows a young Charles and Diana in their school uniforms standing side by side on what was their first day of primary school in 1968. Earl Spencer, 59, captioned the photo, "My first day of school, in September 1968: my father took this photograph of me and my sister, Diana, just before he drove us to Silfield, a really lovely primary school in King's Lynn, Norfolk." "The headmistress was Miss Jean Lowe, a warm and thoughtful lady who loved her boys and girls." "I was there till 1972, when I headed off to the place I call - in my memoir - A Very Private School." <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/C5TfsiIoQL8/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/C5TfsiIoQL8/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Charles Spencer (@charles.earl.spencer)</a> </div> </blockquote> Three years after the photo was taken, Charles was separated from his sister to attend a boarding school, Maidwell Hall Prep School. Throughout the Spencer children's schooling life, Diana was always "very protective" over her brother and "just wouldn't settle" in class until she knew he was okay. Charles told <a title="HELLO!" href="https://www.hellomagazine.com/royalty/516378/charles-spencer-shares-poignant-childhood-anecdote-princess-diana/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">HELLO!</a> that he and Diana had a unique bond when they were growing up. "My mother [Frances] left home when we were young – I was two or three, and Diana would have been five or six – so we were very much in it together," he said. Diana soon fell into a caretaker role, and would look after her brother after their mother left. "Diana looked after me because she was nearly three years older than me," Charles Spencer said. "She said that the worst part was hearing me cry down the hall because she was terrified of the dark and couldn't come to me." Image credits: Instagram

Family & Pets

Days are getting shorter and colder. 6 tips for sticking to your fitness goal

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/juliana-s-oliveira-709434">Juliana S. Oliveira</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/anne-tiedemann-409380">Anne Tiedemann</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/cathie-sherrington-561141">Cathie Sherrington</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/leanne-hassett-1497197">Leanne Hassett</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a> Daylight saving ends this weekend. The days are shorter and getting colder. It’s less appealing to cycle to work, walk after dinner, or wake up early to hit the gym. But we all know daily physical activity is essential for our health and wellbeing. Physical activity releases feel-good neurotransmitters in our brains, which help to alleviate <a href="https://bjsm.bmj.com/content/57/18/1203">stress, anxiety, and depression</a>. It also helps <a href="https://www.cdc.gov/chronicdisease/resources/infographic/physical-activity.htm#:%7E:text=Regular%20physical%20activity%20helps%20improve,depression%20and%20anxiety%2C%20and%20dementia.">prevent diseases</a> such as diabetes, heart disease and some cancers. Regular physical activity can prolong life and improve overall quality of life. However, many of us find it difficult to achieve the <a href="https://bjsm.bmj.com/content/54/24/1451">recommended 150 minutes of moderate intensity physical activity</a> each week. In fact, three out of ten Australians and half of Australians aged 65 and over are <a href="https://www.aihw.gov.au/reports/physical-activity/physical-activity">inactive</a>. So, what can you do to stay motivated and keep moving regularly through the darker months? Here are some tips. <h2>1. Nail those goals</h2> Goals can provide us with a sense of purpose, meaning and direction. But just aiming to “get fit” is less likely to cut it than goals that are SMART: specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time-bound. Specific goals are based on an observable behaviour or activity, such as step count, yoga, or competing in an event. Measurable goals can be tracked, so you can easily tell whether you have ticked them off. Achievable goals are realistic and based on your current fitness and abilities. But they can and should still be challenging. If you’ve only ever run 5 kilometres, it won’t be realistic to aim for a half marathon in the next month. But you could aim for 10 kilometres. Relevant goals hold personal meaning for you. Articulating why it’s important will help motivate you to do it. Time-bound goals include a target date for achieving them. You can always revisit your deadline if you’re ahead of schedule or if it’s too unrealistic. An example of a SMART goal could be: “I will walk 10,000 steps every weekday within a month.” Then you can break it down into short-term goals to make it more achievable. If you currently walk 6,000 steps each day, you can increase steps by 1,000 every week to reach 10,000 by the end of the month. <h2>2. Keep track</h2> More than <a href="https://www.deloitte.com/au/en/Industries/tmt/blogs/digital-consumer-trends-who-is-purchasing-what-now.html">90% of Australians own a smartphone</a> and more than <a href="https://www.deloitte.com/au/en/Industries/telecom-media-entertainment/blogs/digital-consumer-trends-touch-less-healthier-wiser.html">two in ten own a fitness tracker or a smartwatch</a>. These devices can help you track your goals and activity, keep you accountable and increase your motivation. A 2021 systematic review suggests fitness trackers and smartphone apps <a href="https://bjsm.bmj.com/content/55/8/422">can assist people</a> to increase their step count by up to 2,000 steps per day. <a href="https://bjsm.bmj.com/content/54/20/1188">Our research</a> demonstrated fitness trackers can also be helpful in increasing physical activity among older people. If you don’t have a fitness tracker, you can buy low-cost pedometers or track your activity times using paper and pen. <h2>3. Plan for success but prepare for barriers</h2> Take some time to think about the potential barriers that could prevent you from being active and plan solutions to overcome them. For example, if the cost of physical activity is too high for you, try to find options that are free, such as walking or running. You can also consider free online programs or streaming videos. If you find it difficult to fit exercise into your busy schedule, try exercising early in the morning before you start your day and laying out your workout clothes the night before. You could consider joining a gym with flexible timetables. A good strategy is to try to fit physical activity into your daily routine, such as walking or cycling to work. If you are living with a chronic health condition or disability, consider seeking guidance from a health professional such as an <a href="https://www.essa.org.au/Public/SearchAEP.aspx?WebsiteKey=44cfee74-3fc3-444e-bb5f-77729c390872">exercise physiologist</a> or <a href="https://choose.physio/find-a-physio">physiotherapist</a>. Start slow and gradually increase your activity and find something you enjoy so you are more likely to keep doing it. <h2>4. Team up with a workout friend</h2> Physical activity can be more fun when you do it with someone else. Studies show <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0167494322002953?via%253Dihub&sa=D&source=docs&ust=1712015093947627&usg=AOvVaw1XGQBMDMFspL5YrQtKo3h">working out with friends can be more motivating and enjoyable</a>. It can also help with accountability, as some people are more likely to show up when they have a workout partner. So, <a href="https://www.thelancet.com/journals/lancet/article/PIIS0140-6736(13)60407-9/fulltext">find a friend</a> who supports your goal of being more active or maintaining your current activity levels. <h2>5. Plan yourself a little treat</h2> Make an appointment with yourself in your diary to exercise. Approach it as just as important as meeting a friend or colleague. One idea is to delay something you’d rather do and make it a reward for sticking to your activity appointment. If you really want to go out for coffee, do a hobby, or watch something, go for a walk first. Research shows <a href="https://www.nature.com/articles/s41746-019-0164-3">incentives can dramatically increase physical activity levels</a>. <h2>6. Find a coach</h2> If you want more support, <a href="https://bjsm.bmj.com/content/51/19/1425">health coaching</a> might be an option. Trained professionals work one-on-one with people, sometimes via telehealth, to find out what’s reducing their motivation to make healthier choices, such as exercise. Then they employ behaviour change techniques to help them meet their health goals. Our recent research suggests health coaching can improve physical activity in <a href="https://bjsm.bmj.com/content/58/7/382">older people</a> and those with <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S183695532400002X">chronic pain</a>. In <a href="https://www.gethealthynsw.com.au/#:%7E:text=About%20the%20Get%20Healthy%20Service&text=Delivered%20by%20NSW%20Health%2C%20the,and%20achieve%20your%20health%20goals">New South Wales</a>, <a href="https://lifeprogram.org.au/">Victoria</a> and <a href="https://www.myhealthforlife.com.au/">Queensland</a>, these sessions are government-subsidised or free.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/226619/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/juliana-s-oliveira-709434">Juliana S. Oliveira</a>, Postdoctoral Research Fellow, Physical Activity, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/anne-tiedemann-409380">Anne Tiedemann</a>, Professor of Physical Activity and Health, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/cathie-sherrington-561141">Cathie Sherrington</a>, Professor, Institute for Musculoskeletal Health, School of Public Health, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/leanne-hassett-1497197">Leanne Hassett</a>, Associate Professor in Physiotherapy, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/days-are-getting-shorter-and-colder-6-tips-for-sticking-to-your-fitness-goals-226619">original article</a>.

Body

How to fall asleep without sleeping pills: 7 natural sleep aids that actually work

It’s 3am and you’re suddenly wide awake. Try these seven science-backed strategies to fall back to sleep fast. Give meditation a try As a mindfulness coach, I’m very aware of the day-to-day anxieties and worries that can interfere with a good night’s sleep. One of the most effective natural sleep aids is a quick meditation session to ease yourself out of those stresses. If you’ve never meditated before, you’ll likely find the meditation interrupted by thoughts flashing through your mind. It’s important for you to know that this isn’t a failure on your part, and that you aren’t doing anything wrong. Thinking is just what the brain does, as naturally as lungs take in air. The point is to be non-judgmental yet aware of your thoughts, bodily experiences and breath, moment by moment. Stop wanting to fall asleep It’s counterintuitive, isn’t it? Sometimes trying too hard to do something is the very thing that prevents us from achieving it – and that’s never more true than when it comes to falling asleep. Desperately wanting to sleep will only stoke anxieties that will further stress your brain, essentially feeding it the message that it’s not safe to sleep. Throw in those worries about your to-do list at work the following day, and the whole thing can snowball into a panic attack. Try letting go of that feeling that you absolutely must sleep now, and observe your own anxieties for what they are without judgment. When you stop looking at sleep as a goal, you’ll find it easier to fall asleep. Start a journal If you find yourself struggling to fall asleep, pick up a pen and paper (not your phone!), and start writing: simply scribble down an account of what’s going on inside your head. Although there’s no “right” way to journal, you might start by listing the events of your day, and from there, how those events and encounters made you feel. Building this structured picture of your thoughts may help you see that the problem that’s keeping you up at night, and is likely less overwhelming than you thought. Why my insistence on a pen and paper? First off, studies show the simple motor action that’s involved in the act of handwriting has a calming effect. Secondly, the light emitted by laptops and phones isn’t conducive to falling asleep. Find yourself a "3am friend" Some of us are lucky to have a ‘3am friend’, that close confidant you can call up in the wee hours knowing that they won’t hold it against you in the morning. Although it’s great to have someone to talk to when you want to fall asleep, it’s important that the conversation doesn’t just rehash the anxieties that are preventing you from catching shut-eye in the first place. Rather than using the call to seek solutions for those issues, talk about things that calm your nerves, or even have them assist you in deep breathing. It may sound silly, but doing a series of deep, relaxing breaths can help you let go of the troubles that are keeping you wide awake. Take a warm shower Taking a warm shower not only relaxes your muscles and soothes minor aches and pains, but it also raises your core body temperature. As soon as you step out of the shower, your body starts working at lowering that temperature, which is something that normally happens when you’re falling asleep naturally. (That’s why we always feel the need for a blanket when we sleep, no matter how warm it is!) By kick-starting that temperature-lowering process, you’re tricking your body into falling asleep fast. Stretch yourself to sleep Anxiety keeping you up? Research suggests mild stretching can help take the edge off and relax muscles that have become stiff and sore after a long day. We’re not talking intricate yoga poses or acrobatics here, either: Simple stretches like an overhead arm stretch and bending over to touch your toes should do the trick. Ramp up the relaxation potential with a soundtrack of ambient noise at a volume that’s just barely audible. There are plenty of white noise apps that are free to download, but soft music can work as well (so long as there are no lyrics). Just remember, if you’re using an electronic device to play these sleep-promoting sounds, make sure it’s placed screen-down so you’re not distracted by the light it emits. Read (or listen!) to something new When you’re struggling with insomnia, it might be tempting to pull an old favourite off the bookshelf. In reality, it’s better to read or listen to an audio book that covers a topic on which you know absolutely nothing. New information, while taking attention away from the stressors that are keeping you up at night, gives your brain enough of a workout to make it tire more quickly than when it’s engaged with familiar subjects and concepts. Again, if it’s an audio book or podcast you’re listening to, make sure the light-emitting side of the device is face down to keep the room as dark as possible. Darkness and warmth play an essential part in the production and maintenance of melatonin, the hormone that plays the central role falling asleep. Image credits: Getty Images This article by Deepak Kashyap originally appeared on <a href="https://www.readersdigest.co.nz/healthsmart/conditions/sleep/how-to-fall-asleep-without-sleeping-pills-7-natural-sleep-aids-that-actually-work" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Reader's Digest</a>.

Body

6 major benefits of doing yoga every day, from experts

<h2>Positive effects of yoga</h2> Sometimes it’s the simplest daily practice that can have the biggest impact on your health, and yoga is proof of that. Although most forms of yoga aren’t considered to be as intense as other workout regimens (think your average cycling class!), practising yoga on a daily basis has been scientifically demonstrated to help you mentally and physically. Through breath work, meditation and holding poses that increase strength and flexibility, the body and mind reap benefits from yoga that positively impact your long-term health. It’s no wonder people have been practising yoga for over 5000 years, and that the number of Australians practising yoga doubled between 2008 and 2017 to over two million, according to the Australian Bureau of Statistics. In order to get the full scope of what practising yoga daily can really do for your body, we spoke with several experts who have seen the ways yoga has positively benefited their students, patients… and even themselves. <a href="https://gaiam.innovations.co.nz/p/gaiam-yoga/mats?affiliate=GAIAM60" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Keen to try? You’ll need a mat. There’s a range of mats to suit every yoga level, check out these we recommend.</a> <h2>Yoga assists with mood regulation</h2> <img src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/2024/03/6benefitsyoga_getty2.jpg" alt="" width="1280" height="720" /> Yoga teacher, Jenni Tarma, shares, “We have a wealth of research demonstrating that a regular mindfulness practice – the act of paying attention to the sensation in the body, thoughts and emotions without judgment – can reduce stress and help us to feel calmer, more productive, and generally more even-keeled in our daily lives.” After evaluating yoga history and research, one 2014 review published in Frontiers in Human Neouroscience concluded that regular yoga practice can help facilitate self-regulation (the ability to understand and manage your behaviour and reactions). Another study of adolescents between the ages of 13 and 18 found that practising yoga positively benefited emotional regulation and self-esteem. “Movement releases beneficial neurotransmitters in the brain, which helps us feel good as well as assist in mood regulation,” says yoga instructor, Evan Lawrence. “One of the things that I like about yoga specifically is that there is simultaneously a focus on physical movement and breathing.” <a href="https://www.readersdigest.co.nz/culture/23-instant-mood-boosters-you-wont-want-to-live-without" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Don’t miss these instant mood boosters you won’t want to live without.</a> <h2>Yoga builds up your core strength</h2> <img src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/2024/03/6benefitsyoga_shutterstock3.jpg" alt="" width="1280" height="720" /> Personal trainer and yoga teacher, Gina Newton, says, “From a physical perspective, yoga is so great for increasing our core strength, which should be a non-negotiable part of every human’s workout.” Newton adds, “We all need our core – and especially women who have been pregnant or had children, our core strength is something we need to care for and nurture to hold us up.” According to Harvard Medical School, a stronger core benefits the body in multiple ways, including providing better posture, balance, stability, relief for lower back pain, and support through daily tasks like cleaning, working, and athletic activities or exercise. Wearing comfortable yoga gear will help you get the most out of your workout. <a href="https://gaiam.innovations.co.nz/p/gaiam-apparel/apparel?affiliate=GAIAM60" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Check out these yoga clothes from Gaiam.</a> <h2>Yoga reduces stress</h2> <img src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/2024/03/6benefitsyoga_getty4.jpg" alt="" width="1280" height="720" /> “Yoga and meditation are powerful tools for stress resilience and strengthening mental health,” says holistic healthcare practitioner and yoga instructor, Nicole Renée Matthews. “Doing yoga regularly promotes mental clarity and calmness, centres and relaxes the mind, helps to relieve stress patterns and anxiety, and boosts concentration and focus.” One 2010 study from the Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine concluded that practising yoga can improve mood and decrease anxiety even more than a regular walking practice after participants finished a 12-week program. Researchers have also found that the breath-taking techniques involved with yoga can be part of what benefits decreased anxiety during practice. “Breath awareness, another key component of yoga, has been shown to reduce physiological markers of stress, especially when using techniques such as ‘belly breathing’ – breathing deeply so that the abdomen expands, rather than exclusively using a shallow chest breath – and elongating the exhalation,” says Tarma. “These techniques help to activate the parasympathetic nervous system, which in turn leads to less anxiety, jitteriness, and improved sleep; all things that can improve our mental health on a day-to-day basis.” <a href="https://www.readersdigest.co.nz/healthsmart/conditions/mental-health/10-science-backed-ways-to-lower-your-stress-this-instant-really" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Don’t miss these science-backed ways to lower your stress this instant (really!).</a> <h2>Yoga improves brain health</h2> <img src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/2024/03/6benefitsyoga_getty5.jpg" alt="" width="1280" height="720" /> According to associate professor of psychiatry, Dr Gail Saltz, practising yoga “improves overall blood flow to the body, including the brain, [which is] helpful for cognition and memory.” One 2019 review published in Brain Plasticity concluded that behavioural interventions like yoga can help “mitigate age-related and neurodegenerative decline” due to the positive effects a daily practice has on different parts of the functioning brain, like the hippocampus (which plays a major role in learning and memory) and the prefrontal cortex (cognitive control functions). Staying hydrated is key to maintaining optimum brain health. <a href="https://gaiam.innovations.co.nz/p/takeya/water-bottles-actives-range?affiliate=GAIAM60" target="_blank" rel="noopener">These drink bottles can help you keep your water intake up throughout the day.</a> <h2>Yoga improves flexibility and mobility</h2> <img src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/2024/03/6benefitsyoga_shutterstock6.jpg" alt="" width="1280" height="720" /> “Physically, daily yoga practice allows us to engage our muscles and move through larger ranges of joint motion than we do typically moving through life,” says Lawrence. “This helps to keep us limber and flexible.” “Dedicated, daily yoga practice helps with flexibility and strength, which can help improve your posture, as well as balance,” says yoga instructor, Samantha Hoff. “On the physical side, it also helps with joint mobility since you’ll take your joints through most – or all – of their ranges of motion.” <a href="https://www.readersdigest.co.nz/healthsmart/12-best-yoga-poses-to-strengthen-bones" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Here are the best yoga poses to strengthen bones.</a> <h2>Yoga strengthens muscle and endurance</h2> <img src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/2024/03/6benefitsyoga_getty7.jpg" alt="" width="1280" height="720" /> “From a musculoskeletal perspective,” says Tarma, “yoga loads our bodies and joints in a wide variety of positions and scenarios: think longer static holds in poses that challenge our tissues’ endurance, or controlled transitions between shapes that develop strength, control and coordination. These different facets of our movement capabilities all contribute to better overall function and load-tolerance capacity. As an added bonus, because most styles of yoga are bodyweight only and move at a very moderate speed, yoga is also a generally very accessible and safe movement modality.” Yoga is the ultimate self-care activity. <a href="https://gaiam.innovations.co.nz/p/gaiam-yoga/accessories/27-73312-gaiam-performance-hold-everything-yoga-backpack-bag?affiliate=GAIAM60" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Whether you do it at a studio or in the park, this handy yoga backpack bag stores everything you need for a calm yoga workout.</a> This article, written by Kiersten Hickman, originally appeared on <a href="https://www.readersdigest.co.nz/culture/6-major-benefits-of-doing-yoga-every-day-from-experts" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Reader's Digest</a>. Images: Shutterstock | Getty

Body

King Charles delivers heartfelt message amidst cancer treatment

In times of adversity, the power of unity and compassion shines through, and this sentiment has never been more evident than in the heartfelt message delivered by King Charles amidst his cancer treatment. As news of his diagnosis spread, an outpouring of support enveloped the King from all corners of the Commonwealth. His gratitude and appreciation for this unwavering kindness were palpable as he addressed the nations in a video message, unable to personally attend the 2024 Commonwealth Day celebrations due to his health. "I have been most deeply touched by your wonderfully kind and thoughtful good wishes for my health and, in return, can only continue to serve you, to the best of my ability, throughout the Commonwealth," he said. "My belief in our shared endeavours and in the potential of our people remains as sure and strong as it has ever been. I have no doubt that we will continue to support one another across the Commonwealth as, together, we continue this vital journey." The absence of the Princess of Wales, still in recovery from surgery, served as a reminder of the fragility of life and the importance of cherishing every moment with loved ones. In such moments, the strength of familial bonds and the support of a caring community become invaluable lifelines. As we celebrate the 75th anniversary of the Commonwealth, we reflect not only on its historical significance but also on its enduring relevance in today's world. The theme of "One Resilient Common Future: Transforming our Commonwealth" resonates deeply as we navigate the challenges of the modern age together. King Charles' words remind us of the interconnectedness of our shared humanity, transcending borders and differences. He likened the Commonwealth to the wiring of a house, where each nation contributes to the collective energy and strength that sustains us all: "As I have said before, the Commonwealth is like the wiring of a house, and its people, our energy and our ideas are the current that runs through those wires. Together and individually we are strengthened by sharing perspectives and experiences, and by offering and borrowing the myriad ways we have each tackled the challenges of our time. This is true both at the level of nations and, indeed, at the local level. We recognise today that our diversity is our greatest strength." In facing global challenges such as climate change, biodiversity loss and socioeconomic shifts, the importance of collaboration and cooperation cannot be overstated. King Charles eloquently underscored the power of diversity as our greatest strength, recognising that it is through our varied perspectives and experiences that we find innovative solutions to complex problems. <iframe title="YouTube video player" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/lR6Z8ss_AW0?si=Gf8lGHmG-xnw9zCP" width="560" height="315" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe> Image: Youtube

Caring

How to be kind to yourself (without going to a day spa)

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lydia-brown-179583">Lydia Brown</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/the-university-of-melbourne-722">The University of Melbourne</a> “I have to be hard on myself,” Sarah told me in a recent telehealth psychology session. “I would never reach my potential if I was kind and let myself off the hook.” I could empathise with this fear of self-compassion from clients such as Sarah (not her real name). From a young age, we are taught to be kind to others, but self-kindness is never mentioned. Instead, we are taught success hinges on self-sacrifice. And we need a healthy inner critic to bully us forward into becoming increasingly better versions of ourselves. But <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0146167212445599">research shows</a> there doesn’t have to be a trade-off between self-compassion and success. Self-compassion can help you reach your potential, while supporting you to face the inevitable stumbles and setbacks along the way. <h2>What is self-compassion?</h2> <a href="https://self-compassion.org/">Self-compassion</a> has <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/15298860309027">three</a> key ingredients. 1. Self-kindness This involves treating yourself with the same kindness you would extend towards a good friend – via your thoughts, feelings and actions – especially during life’s difficult moments. For instance, if you find yourself fixating on a minor mistake you made at work, self-kindness might involve taking a ten-minute walk to shift focus, and reminding yourself it is OK to make mistakes sometimes, before moving on with your day. 2. Mindfulness In this context, mindfulness involves being aware of your own experience of stress or suffering, rather than repressing or avoiding your feelings, or over-identifying with them. Basically, you must see your stress with a clear (mindful) perspective before you can respond with kindness. If we avoid or are consumed by our suffering, we lose perspective. 3. Common humanity Common humanity involves recognising our own experience of suffering as something that unites us as being human. For instance, a sleep-deprived parent waking up (for the fourth time) to feed their newborn might choose to think about all the other parents around the world doing exactly the same thing – as opposed to feeling isolated and alone. <h2>It’s not about day spas, or booking a manicure</h2> When Sarah voiced her fear that self-compassion would prevent her success, I explained self-compassion is distinct from self-indulgence. “So is self-compassion just about booking in more mani/pedis?” Sarah asked. Not really, I explained. A one-off trip to a day spa is unlikely to transform your mental health. Instead, self-compassion is a flexible <a href="https://link.springer.com/chapter/10.1007/978-3-031-22348-8_7">psychological resilience factor</a> that shapes our thoughts, feelings and actions. It’s associated with a suite of benefits to our <a href="https://iaap-journals.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/aphw.12051">wellbeing</a>, <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/15298868.2011.639548">relationships</a> and <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/17437199.2019.1705872">health</a>. <h2>What does the science say?</h2> Over the past 20 years, we’ve learned self-compassionate people enjoy a wide range of benefits. They tend to be <a href="https://iaap-journals.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/aphw.12051">happier</a> and have <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2012.06.003">fewer psychological symptoms</a> of distress. Those high on self-compassion <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0146167212445599">persevere</a> following a failure. They say they are more motivated to overcome a personal weakness than those low on self-compassion, who are more likely to give up. So rather than feeling trapped by your inadequacies, self-compassion encourages a <a href="https://hbr.org/2018/09/give-yourself-a-break-the-power-of-self-compassion">growth mindset</a>, helping you reach your potential. However, self-compassion is not a panacea. It will not change your life circumstances or somehow make life “easy”. It is based on the premise that life is hard, and provides practical tools to cope. <h2>It’s a factor in healthy ageing</h2> I research menopause and healthy ageing and am especially interested in the value of self-compassion through menopause and in the second half of life. Because self-compassion becomes important during life’s challenges, it can help people navigate physical symptoms (for instance, <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0378512214001649?via%3Dihub">menopausal hot flushes</a>), life transitions such as <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0956797611429466">divorce</a>, and <a href="https://link.springer.com/chapter/10.1007/978-3-031-22348-8_7">promote healthy ageing</a>. I’ve also teamed up with researchers at <a href="https://www.autismspectrum.org.au/">Autism Spectrum Australia</a> to explore self-compassion in autistic adults. We found autistic adults report significantly <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10803-022-05668-y">lower levels</a> of self-compassion than neurotypical adults. So we developed an online <a href="https://www.autismspectrum.org.au/blog/new-online-self-compassion-program-for-autistic-adults">self-compassion training program</a> for this at-risk population. <h2>Three tips for self-compassion</h2> You <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1002/jclp.21923">can learn</a> self-compassion with these three exercises. 1. What would you say to a friend? Think back to the last time you made a mistake. What did you say to yourself? If you notice you’re treating yourself more like an enemy than a friend, don’t beat yourself up about it. Instead, try to think about what you might tell a friend, and direct that same friendly language towards yourself. 2. Harness the power of touch Soothing human touch <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychiatry/articles/10.3389/fpsyt.2020.555058/full">activates</a> the parasympathetic “relaxation” branch of our nervous system and counteracts the fight or flight response. Specifically, self-soothing touch (for instance, by placing both hands on your heart, stroking your forearm or giving yourself a hug) <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2666497621000655">reduces</a> cortisol responses to psychosocial stress. 3. What do I need right now? Sometimes, it can be hard to figure out exactly what self-compassion looks like in a given moment. The question “what do I need right now” helps clarify your true needs. For example, when I was 37 weeks pregnant, I woke up bolt awake one morning at 3am. Rather than beating myself up about it, or fretting about not getting enough sleep, I gently placed my hands on my heart and took a few deep breaths. By asking myself “what do I need right now?” it became clear that listening to a gentle podcast/meditation fitted the bill (even though I wanted to addictively scroll my phone).<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/223194/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lydia-brown-179583">Lydia Brown</a>, Senior Lecturer in Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/the-university-of-melbourne-722">The University of Melbourne</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-to-be-kind-to-yourself-without-going-to-a-day-spa-223194">original article</a>.

Caring

Bride sparks feud for banning her niece from her big day

A bride-to-be has sparked a feud for deciding to ban her sister’s “loud and distracting” toddler from her wedding ceremony, with the bride asking social media users for advice. The bride was only weeks away from her intimate destination wedding, which included a guest list of only a few friends and close family. After being met with a difficult decision, the bride took to Reddit to share how a massive family feud had erupted in the weeks before the big day. “My sister is bringing her one-year-old toddler. The child is more than welcome — she’s part of the family and we want her there as part of the day,” she began. “However, as she’s still very young (and very loud at times), I’ve asked that somebody takes her out during the ceremony if she’s being distracting, shouting and babbling loudly.” “I know that this will probably happen as she’s constantly chatting loudly and is never quiet.” “But it’s only for half an hour and she can be as loud as she likes for the rest of the day.” “I just want everybody to be able to focus on the ceremony and I don’t want the distraction.” The bride said she was worried about sounding selfish, but then admitted that she was allowed to be selfish on her big day, and wanted all eyes on her and the groom. “We want everyone to be able to enjoy them and, to be honest, we want the guests’ attention focused on us,” she said. However, after the bride told her sister of the plans, things didn’t go down well. “My sister has told me I’m being an a****** for ‘excluding’ my niece from the ceremony and therefore by default ‘excluding’ my brother-in-law who will be the one to take her out,” the bride said. “She says that I’m asking him and the one-year-old to go all that way just for the evening meal as they will miss the ceremony and that the toddler will most likely miss that too as it will be after bedtime.” “I’ve told her that there’s a whole afternoon of relaxing things going on — photos, cake, a little walk outside and late lunch that they will be part of but apparently she’s still really annoyed with me.” The bride says her sister is now “threatening” to attend the wedding alone, leaving her partner and their daughter at home. “We’ve called her bluff and said if that’s what she wants to do then we understand,” she said. “To be honest, she’s p***ing us off so much that we’d be fine with all three of them not coming at this point.” “I don’t think that I’m asking anything unreasonable.” “All I want is a peaceful, relaxed ceremony where we can all focus on what’s going on without a toddler babbling away. “Also, to be honest, even if this WAS an unreasonable ask, surely as it’s my wedding day then it’s up to me? Isn’t it the one day of my life when I can do literally anything I want?” The post was quickly met with hundreds of comments, with most people flocking to the bride’s defence. One person wrote, “This is basic event etiquette, but it seems like sis cannot be relied on to follow basic etiquette - or even asked to do so without herself acting like a toddler.” Another suggested: “Removing a disruptive baby from a formal event would be normal etiquette, but if you specifically had to ask in advance, I’ll guess she’s got a history of not doing so.” “Your wedding, your rules. You could have gone completely child-free, all you asked was for the common courtesy of taking her outside if she got noisy.” Image credits: Shutterstock

Family & Pets

Is Valentine’s Day worth the romantic investment? Here’s what we can learn from economics

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/selma-wather-1510222">Selma Wather</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sussex-1218">University of Sussex</a> Expressing affection can be expensive. Spending on heart-shaped gifts, romantic cards, chocolates and flowers (other gifts are available) to celebrate Valentine’s Day has reached <a href="https://www.statista.com/statistics/510981/valentines-day-total-spending-great-britain/#:%7E:text=In%20the%20United%20Kingdom%20%28UK%29%20alone%2C%20Valentine%E2%80%99s%20Day,increased%20by%20just%20over%20300%20million%20British%20pounds.">close to £1 billion</a> in the UK. So the value of Valentine’s to retailers seems clear enough. But just how valuable is the annual ritual to consumers? What return can you expect for the money you invest in that bouquet of roses or candle lit meal? Broadly speaking, and depending on your relationship status, buying into Valentine’s Day traditions suggests two possible scenarios. You might be sending a card or gift to a potential partner to inform them of your interest; or you might be giving something to your current partner to remind them of your continuing love. Research suggests that both options have intrinsic economic value. For those seeking to express interest, sending a card is like dipping your toe into what economists might refer to as the “marriage market” – the search for someone you like, who likes what you have to offer in return. This search can happen smoothly, with plenty of information about your potential match, or it can be paved with obstacles, where you may not know much about who is available, and <a href="https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=1703310">learning about potential partners</a> takes time. So suppose you are searching for a partner, and comprehensive information about potential matches is not freely available. What do you do? One option might be to put all your hopes into meeting someone on your daily journey to work. You pray that one day, just like in the movies, you will simply bump into “the one”. A second option might be to focus your search on single work colleagues, or people you know socially, and send Valentine’s Day cards to those you are attracted to. The option with the highest chance of success is the second one. You are using reliable information – knowledge of who is single. And sending a card to them can provide them with important information about you – that you’re also single, and that you’re interested. This is why research suggests that sending a Valentine’s Day card can be a <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/2938374?origin=crossref">logical investment</a> of time and money. <h2>‘Match quality’</h2> Fast forward five years or so and imagine you are happily married to the recipient of one of those cards. Is it worth repeating the gesture now that you’re settled down together? Economists think of marriages or partnerships as having an inherent “<a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.1468-2354.2006.00385.x">match quality</a>”, which reflects how good (or bad) your relationship is – and the likelihood of you breaking up. If match quality falls below the level of happiness you might expect to have if you were to leave, a <a href="https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=2759255">separation may well follow</a>. But many studies also show that <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/2535409">match quality is malleable</a> – that it can change, for better and indeed for worse, over time. You can invest in trying to improve match quality in various ways. It might be starting a family, sharing hobbies and interests, or gestures such as cooking a special meal or exchanging gifts on the 14th day of February. Improving your match quality <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/publication/228431914_How_Does_the_Change_of_Marriage_Quality_Affect_Divorce_Decisions">directly reduces the probability</a> of a separation. Then there’s the question of commitment – the willingness to stay in a relationship rather than walking away. And again, gestures can make a difference. Imagine you have just started a new job, and your employer asks you to complete an intensive training session in your free time, for a skill that would only be useful for that particular role. If you expect to hold the job for a long period, you might happily invest your time. But if your employer is struggling financially and redundancy is on the cards, you are much less likely to agree to perform the task. Relationships work in a similar way. People are more prepared to invest in things like having children or buying a house together if they expect the relationship to last. Given that commitment is not guaranteed by a marriage certificate, people <a href="https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=950688">need to find other ways</a> to signal their continued devotion. Celebrating Valentine’s Day is one way of making such a signal. It can show faith in your shared commitment, signify that you wish to continue investing in the relationship and improve match quality, further stabilising the partnership. So even if deep down you think that Valentine’s Day has become over commercialised and meaningless, research suggests it makes good economic sense to send that card.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/223128/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/selma-wather-1510222">Selma Wather</a>, Senior Lecturer in Economics, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sussex-1218">University of Sussex</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/is-valentines-day-worth-the-romantic-investment-heres-what-we-can-learn-from-economics-223128">original article</a>.

Money & Banking

"I want answers": Simon Dorante-Day's cunning plan to prove royal connections

The Queensland man claiming to be the son of King Charles and Queen Camilla has shared his new plan to prove once and for all that he has royal family connections. Simon Dorante-Day has long claimed through his 30 years of research, he discovered that he is the illegitimate son of the monarch, and has attempted to prove his theory through various means. Now, his new plan to get his hands on royal DNA to unequivocally prove his family heritage involves another member of the royal family. Speaking with <a href="https://7news.com.au/lifestyle/aussie-man-claiming-to-be-charles-son-drops-new-prince-harry-dna-bombshell-c-13488374" target="_blank" rel="noopener">7News</a>, the 57-year-old said he and his wife have been told by a “trusted source” that Prince Harry could be amenable to helping them gather proof. “We got advice from a really good, really trusted source that we should approach Harry and make a connection there and ask for DNA,” Elvianna said. Simon added, “I was really taken aback when he said that. But it’s definitely something I’m going to do. I’ve long been a supporter of Harry and Meghan, I think it’s disgraceful the way they’ve been treated by the royal family." “The way they are treated on social media too, it’s just one big ‘Punch-Meghan-and-Harry-a-thon’, seriously. It’s really starting to annoy me." He said he is planning to "make contact with him and explore this as an opportunity," pointing out that the royal family's treatment of Harry could make him more willing to help. "At the end of the day, I feel like he just might be as keen as I am to expose what Charles and Camilla and the powers that be have done to me. The injustice." “It’s worth me pointing out that Charles and Camilla, Buckingham Palace, the entire royal family - not one of them has ever said my claims are not true. They’ve never denied what I believe, told me I’m wrong." Simon said “the wheels are in motion” in terms of making contact with Prince Harry, and that he’s hopeful of a positive outcome. “I want answers,” he said. “And I feel Prince Harry is the man to help me find them.” “And I think their silence speaks volumes.” Simon said “the wheels are in motion” in terms of making contact with Prince Harry, and that he’s hopeful of a positive outcome. “I want answers,” he said. “And I feel Prince Harry is the man to help me find them.” Image credits: Facebook / Getty Images

Family & Pets

How much weight do you actually need to lose? It might be a lot less than you think

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/nick-fuller-219993">Nick Fuller</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a> If you’re one of the <a href="https://www.finder.com.au/new-years-resolutions-statistics">one in three</a> Australians whose New Year’s resolution involved losing weight, it’s likely you’re now contemplating what weight-loss goal you should actually be working towards. But type “setting a weight loss goal” into any online search engine and you’ll likely be left with more questions than answers. Sure, the many weight-loss apps and calculators available will make setting this goal seem easy. They’ll typically use a body mass index (BMI) calculator to confirm a “healthy” weight and provide a goal weight based on this range. Your screen will fill with trim-looking influencers touting diets that will help you drop ten kilos in a month, or ads for diets, pills and exercise regimens promising to help you effortlessly and rapidly lose weight. Most sales pitches will suggest you need to lose substantial amounts of weight to be healthy – making weight loss seem an impossible task. But the research shows you don’t need to lose a lot of weight to achieve health benefits. <h2>Using BMI to define our target weight is flawed</h2> We’re a society fixated on numbers. So it’s no surprise we use measurements and equations to score our weight. The most popular is BMI, a measure of our body weight-to-height ratio. BMI classifies bodies as underweight, normal (healthy) weight, overweight or obese and can be a useful tool for weight and health screening. But it shouldn’t be used as the single measure of what it means to be a healthy weight when we set our weight-loss goals. This is <a href="https://theconversation.com/using-bmi-to-measure-your-health-is-nonsense-heres-why-180412">because</a> it: <ul> <li> fails to consider two critical factors related to body weight and health – body fat percentage and distribution </li> <li> does not account for significant differences in body composition based on gender, ethnicity and age. </li> </ul> <h2>How does losing weight benefit our health?</h2> Losing just 5–10% of our body weight – between 6 and 12kg for someone weighing 120kg – can significantly improve our health in four key ways. 1. Reducing cholesterol Obesity increases the chances of having too much low-density lipoprotein (LDL) cholesterol – also known as bad cholesterol – because carrying excess weight changes how our bodies produce and manage lipoproteins and triglycerides, another fat molecule we use for energy. Having too much bad cholesterol and high triglyceride levels is not good, narrowing our arteries and limiting blood flow, which increases the risk of heart disease, heart attack and stroke. But <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4987606/">research</a> shows improvements in total cholesterol, LDL cholesterol and triglyceride levels are evident with just 5% weight loss. 2. Lowering blood pressure Our blood pressure is considered high if it reads more than 140/90 on at least two occasions. Excess weight is <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7082272/">linked to</a> high blood pressure in <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7082272/">several ways</a>, including changing how our sympathetic nervous system, blood vessels and hormones regulate our blood pressure. Essentially, high blood pressure makes our heart and blood vessels work harder and less efficiently, damaging our arteries over time and increasing our risk of heart disease, heart attack and stroke. Like the improvements in cholesterol, a 5% weight loss <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/oby.21358">improves</a> both systolic blood pressure (the first number in the reading) and diastolic blood pressure (the second number). A <a href="https://www.ahajournals.org/doi/10.1161/01.hyp.0000094221.86888.ae">meta-analysis of 25 trials</a> on the influence of weight reduction on blood pressure also found every kilo of weight loss improved blood pressure by one point. 3. Reducing risk for type 2 diabetes Excess body weight is the primary manageable risk factor for type 2 diabetes, particularly for people carrying a lot of visceral fat around the abdomen (belly fat). Carrying this excess weight can cause fat cells to release pro-inflammatory chemicals that disrupt how our bodies regulate and use the insulin produced by our pancreas, leading to high blood sugar levels. Type 2 diabetes can lead to serious medical conditions if it’s not carefully managed, including damaging our heart, blood vessels, major organs, eyes and nervous system. <a href="https://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/nejmoa012512">Research</a> shows just 7% weight loss reduces risk of developing type 2 diabetes by 58%. 4. Reducing joint pain and the risk of osteoarthritis Carrying excess weight can cause our joints to become inflamed and damaged, making us more prone to osteoarthritis. <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21425246/">Observational studies</a> show being overweight doubles a person’s risk of developing osteoarthritis, while obesity increases the risk fourfold. Small amounts of weight loss alleviate this stress on our joints. <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/15986358/">In one study</a> each kilogram of weight loss resulted in a fourfold decrease in the load exerted on the knee in each step taken during daily activities. <h2>Focus on long-term habits</h2> If you’ve ever tried to lose weight but found the kilos return almost as quickly as they left, you’re not alone. An <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5764193/">analysis</a> of 29 long-term weight-loss studies found participants regained more than half of the weight lost within two years. Within five years, they regained more than 80%. When we lose weight, we take our body out of its comfort zone and trigger its survival response. It then counteracts weight loss, triggering several <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25896063/">physiological responses</a> to defend our body weight and “survive” starvation. Just as the problem is evolutionary, the solution is evolutionary too. Successfully losing weight long-term comes down to: <ul> <li> losing weight in small manageable chunks you can sustain, specifically periods of weight loss, followed by periods of weight maintenance, and so on, until you achieve your goal weight </li> <li> making gradual changes to your lifestyle to ensure you form habits that last a lifetime. </li> </ul> Setting a goal to reach a healthy weight can feel daunting. But it doesn’t have to be a pre-defined weight according to a “healthy” BMI range. Losing 5–10% of our body weight will result in immediate health benefits. At the Boden Group, Charles Perkins Centre, we are studying the science of obesity and running clinical trials for weight loss. You can <a href="https://redcap.sydney.edu.au/surveys/?s=RKTXPPPHKY">register here</a> to express your interest.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/217287/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/nick-fuller-219993">Nick Fuller</a>, Charles Perkins Centre Research Program Leader, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-much-weight-do-you-actually-need-to-lose-it-might-be-a-lot-less-than-you-think-217287">original article</a>.

Body

Jimmy Barnes' granddaughter's touching tribute at Red Hot Summer

With Jimmy Barnes currently recovering from <a href="https://www.oversixty.co.nz/health/caring/the-dose-of-magic-helping-jimmy-barnes-recover-after-surgery" target="_blank" rel="noopener">open heart surgery</a>, there was no way he could perform at the Red Hot Summer Tour, but his family and friends have come together to put on a show in honour of the star. The Barnes All-Stars, formed by none other than Jimmy's own daughter Mahalia, includes stars like Jon Stevens, Chris Cheney, and his legendary Cold Chisel bandmate, Ian Moss. The band have been headlining for the first three shows of the tour, and performed classic songs by Cold Chisel and Jimmy Barnes, which were compiled by the rock star himself. While the band put on a stellar show, Jimmy's granddaughter, Ruby Rogers' performance of the the Chisel classic Flame Trees, stole the hearts of fans. "In case you didn’t get to see this fantastic performance, this is granddaughter Ruby filling in for me on the weekend," Jimmy tweeted, gushing over her performance. "I love her so much. Thanks everyone. Full video on my FB page," he added. <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> In case you didn’t get to see this fantastic performance, this is granddaughter Ruby filling in for me on the weekend. I love her so much. Thanks everyone. Full video on my FB page <a href="https://t.co/DgOApqBwnZ">pic.twitter.com/DgOApqBwnZ</a> — Jimmy Barnes (@JimmyBarnes) <a href="https://twitter.com/JimmyBarnes/status/1746809216399265998?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">January 15, 2024</a></blockquote> The clip shows Ruby singing an acoustic version of the song, and the crowd of over 8000 people can be heard singing along with her. Fans have taken to the comments to praise Ruby's talent. "Doing you proud Jimmy. What a beautiful voice Ruby has. Such a talented family you and Jane have," one wrote. "Absolutely stunning beautiful Ruby. You are so privileged Jimmy to have such a beautiful granddaughter," another added. "Wow how proud you guys must be. That was a wonderful tribute to you. Such a beautiful, talented girl ❤️" commented a third. Images: Facebook/ Instagram

Family & Pets

Brunei Prince's lavish 10 day wedding

Brunei Prince Abdul Mateen, 32, has tied the knot with Yang Mulia Anisha Roshna, 29, in a lavish 10-day royal wedding. The first few photos of the grand event were posted on Prince Mateen's Instagram, coupled with a few photos from the couple's childhood. "14.01.2024" he captioned the series of photos, with "praise be to God" written underneath the date in Arabic. The couple wed at the Istana Nurul Iman palace in front of 5,000 guests, including royals from Saudia Arabia, Jordan, Indonesia and the Philippines. Yang Mulia Anisha Roshna, looked stunning in a white gown decorated with a silver diamond motif, a floral veil and tiara. She completed the look with a statement diamond necklace and earrings, with natural glam makeup accentuating her features. Prince Mateen, who has over 2.5 million followers on Instagram, and was even crowned one of Asia's <a href="https://www.tatlerasia.com/the-scene/people-parties/asia-s-50-most-eligible-bachelors" target="_blank" rel="noopener">"most eligible bachelors"</a> was dressed in his ceremonial uniform. After the lavish ceremony, the couple took part in a procession all the way to the capital of Bandar Seri Begawan, as they greeted thousands of well-wishers who gathered for the event in an open-top Rolls Royce. The 10-day wedding ceremony based on Islamic traditions began on January 7, with the proposal ceremony where the groom's family officially declared their intention to marry the bride. The day after, family and their guests attended a performance by royal court musicians. The third day consisted of an engagement ceremony where the groom's family brought symbolic gifts to the bride's residence. This was then followed by a powdering ceremony where the bride and groom's families apply powder to the couple's hands so their marriage is blessed with happiness, fertility, and wealth. On the fifth day, the bride and groom officially exchange their vows in a religious ceremony which is followed by the royal banquet. Prince Mateen and his wife announced their engagement in October 2023, but they were rumoured to have been dating for years. The Prince is the 10th child of Brunei Sultan Hassanal Bolkiah, one of the world's richest royals, and Yang Mulia Anisha Roshna is the granddaughter of one of the Sultan’s special advisors. Images: Instagram

Relationships

"It was hard to watch": Sean Connery's final days revealed

Sean Connery's final moments have been revealed in a new book, Connery, Sean Connery, which dives into his decades-long career and the obstacles he faced in life. The Scottish actor, who rose to fame as the original James Bond, passed away on October 31, 2020, at the age of 90. The book written by Herbie J Pilato, features never-before-published commentary from Connery's friend, Brendan Lynch about the actor's final days. The Oscar winner struggled with dementia before his passing, and the book claims that Lynch was requested by Connery’s wife, Micheline Roquebrune, to visit his friend “as much as possible in his last days." In the book, Lynch recalled: “Because he wasn’t well at all, Micheline did ask me to try and see a bit more of him in the end.” “He didn’t want to have people that he didn’t know hanging around, so I would stop in to visit.” “I was crying at times to see this mountain of a man — this monumental human achievement in such a terrible state — frail (mentally and physically) unable to carry on a conversation or finish off a sentence,” Lynch said. “To see his body weak and flawed at the end… it was very sad. We tried to have a conversation. I tried to tell him what was going on in the sporting world, despite knowing that he wasn’t actually taking it all in.” Pilato told Fox News Digital that he spoke to numerous other sources and co-stars to get a better understanding of the man behind the iconic character. “Dementia is not just a mental issue. You’re affected physically in other ways… It affects everything. So it’s not just the mind. And to see someone who was so strong battling this disease — it was difficult," Pilato said. “If anybody looked like a movie star, it was Sean Connery,” he shared. “But towards the end, when he was frail, it was hard to watch. It was hard to see that.” According to the book, the actor's health was kept private “for some time" as he spent his final days surrounded by “sprawling golf courses, near wide-open silky sands and… clear blue Bahamian waters.” Connery died in his sleep, and according to his wife it was exactly "what he wanted.” “At least he died in his sleep, and it was just so peaceful,” she told The Daily Mail on Sunday. “I was with him all the time, and he just slipped away. It was what he wanted." Images: Getty

Caring

"More bad days than good": Sad new pics of Bruce Willis emerge

Bruce Willis' family are "soaking up every moment" with the Hollywood legend, as his health is continuing to deteriorate. The 68-year-old's family have shared new heartbreaking photos of the actor, which show a steep decline in his appearance and capabilities since the onset of his health issues. Willis was diagnosed with frontotemporal dementia at the beginning of 2023, nearly one year after announcing his retirement from acting due to aphasia, which causes difficulties with speech. Since his diagnosis, his family have continued to share updates on the actor's condition. Now, a source close to the family has revealed that the star’s health has worsened in recent weeks, and now there are “more bad days” than good. “Bruce has good days and bad days, but in the last two months, there are many more bad days than good,” a source told <a href="https://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/how-bruce-willis-family-is-supporting-him-as-he-battles-dementia/">US Weekly</a>. “This experience has brought the whole family even closer together. No one knows how much time Bruce has left, so they’re soaking up every moment they get with him.” Another source added that the four-time Golden Globe winner “has around-the-clock care, but at least one family member is always with him.” The beloved Hollywood action star has been spending his days alongside his wife, Emma Heming, ex-wife Demi Moore, and their collective five children, who all care for him throughout his difficult health journey. Image credits: Getty Images / Instagram

Caring

Meryl Streep hits the red carpet with her four children

Meryl Streep has made a rare red carpet appearance with all four of her grown up children. The Hollywood legend was dressed in a chic black dress, exuding endless class at the annual Academy Museum Gala in Los Angeles on Sunday night. The event serves as the Academy Museum of Motion Pictures’ marquee annual fundraiser, raising vital funds to support museum exhibitions, education initiatives and public programming, while also quickly become one of Hollywood’s starriest nights. As Meryl graced the red carpet, she was joined by her four children who she shares with estranged husband Don Gummer. Streep was joined by her son Henry Wolfe and his wife Tamryn Storm Hawker, her daughter Grace Gummer and her husband Mark Ronson, and her other two daughters Mamie Gummer and Louisa Jacobson. Her children were in attendance to celebrate their mother, who was being honoured with the Icon Award during the ceremony. Streep's estranged husband Don was not present at the event, as the pair announced their <a href="https://oversixty.com.au/lifestyle/relationships/meryl-streep-s-shocking-relationship-news" target="_blank" rel="noopener">separation</a> in October. “Don Gummer and Meryl Streep have been separated for more than six years, and while they will always care for each other, they have chosen lives apart,” the Golden Globe winner’s spokesman told Page Six at the time. Image credits: Getty Images

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Do red bags get loaded onto a plane first? Travel hack goes viral

Airbnb launches real-life "Up" house - and it actually floats!

Don’t give mum chocolates for Mother’s Day. Take on more housework, share the mental load and advocate for equality instead

Is attachment theory actually important for romantic relationships?

Give the gift of sustainable luxury this Mother’s Day

"First day of school": Charles Spencer shares unseen snap of Diana

Days are getting shorter and colder. 6 tips for sticking to your fitness goal

How to fall asleep without sleeping pills: 7 natural sleep aids that actually work

6 major benefits of doing yoga every day, from experts

King Charles delivers heartfelt message amidst cancer treatment

How to be kind to yourself (without going to a day spa)

Bride sparks feud for banning her niece from her big day

Is Valentine’s Day worth the romantic investment? Here’s what we can learn from economics

"I want answers": Simon Dorante-Day's cunning plan to prove royal connections

How much weight do you actually need to lose? It might be a lot less than you think

Jimmy Barnes' granddaughter's touching tribute at Red Hot Summer

Brunei Prince's lavish 10 day wedding

"It was hard to watch": Sean Connery's final days revealed

"More bad days than good": Sad new pics of Bruce Willis emerge

Meryl Streep hits the red carpet with her four children

News

Shop

Catalogues

Travel

Health

Lifestyle

Finance

Entertainment

Property

Information

Keep up to date

Search

Do red bags get loaded onto a plane first? Travel hack goes viral

Airbnb launches real-life "Up" house - and it actually floats!

Don’t give mum chocolates for Mother’s Day. Take on more housework, share the mental load and advocate for equality instead

Is attachment theory actually important for romantic relationships?

Give the gift of sustainable luxury this Mother’s Day

"First day of school": Charles Spencer shares unseen snap of Diana

Days are getting shorter and colder. 6 tips for sticking to your fitness goal

How to fall asleep without sleeping pills: 7 natural sleep aids that actually work

6 major benefits of doing yoga every day, from experts

King Charles delivers heartfelt message amidst cancer treatment

How to be kind to yourself (without going to a day spa)

Bride sparks feud for banning her niece from her big day

Is Valentine’s Day worth the romantic investment? Here’s what we can learn from economics

"I want answers": Simon Dorante-Day's cunning plan to prove royal connections

How much weight do you actually need to lose? It might be a lot less than you think

Jimmy Barnes' granddaughter's touching tribute at Red Hot Summer

Brunei Prince's lavish 10 day wedding

"It was hard to watch": Sean Connery's final days revealed

"More bad days than good": Sad new pics of Bruce Willis emerge

Meryl Streep hits the red carpet with her four children

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